Tuesday, December 24, 2019

Practicing Metaphysical Law - autobiographical fiction


From the Cosmic Casino to the Cosmic Court man life is weird all I can say did not see this coming – hey, what do you call a bus full of lawyers with two empty seats that goes over a cliff?
Inefficient! Bada Boom, Bada Bing. I’ll be here all life, friends LOL
So where to start? There’s a hellish prerequisite in the esoteric to properly convey the ministrations of a metaphysical lawyer. It’s a bit like shamanic work only more formalized, if that makes any sense? No probably not. I’ll try again. So shaman operate on the other side of the veil in behalf of their clients in matters principally of protection and healing and not inoften in spiritual assault since actual shaman are not exactly the unicorn and herb tea loving healers that much in the way of Western New Age philosophy encourages us to believe of them. So in similarity, a metaphysical lawyer operates on the other side of the veil on behalf of their clients but only within the limits of the cosmic bar set by Jupiter and enforced by Saturn. Think of Jupiter as the The Judge and Saturn as the bailiff. Saturn is also the enforcer of Jupiter’s Law just trust me it’s too long and complicated an explanation to go into here but you don’t want Saturn showing up at your doorstep with a warrant to enforce otherwise known in the vernacular as “karma”. Which to point, is why I would suggest it wise to retain a cosmic lawyer in any dicey spiritual matter with potential karmic implications. There are two kind of people in the galaxy, those with a lawyer, and those without. You don’t want to be the latter if, God forbid, your spiritual shit hits the fan.
Jupiter’s Court
Mr. Sky, I understand you are here today to present to the court petition for a special writ of dispensation for two clients regarding a soulmate relationship and a twin flame relationship?
Yes, Your Honor.
May I see them now, please. (It is not a question)
I hand Jupiter the petitions for writs and wink at Saturn who ignores me as usual. We are buds now only he won’t admit it. The Malefic. The Grim Reaper. Cronos – yea that one, devoured his own children to prevent them from overtaking him. Ruthless in His commitment to controlling time, embodiment of restriction and limit. When you feel that your time is running out, yea thank Saturn for that shit right there. (Just remember that this tic toc headtrip Saturn lays on you is merely in regards to our bodies here that are merely rentals from Gaia in the first place and not to our eternal souls for whom there is no time since eternity is not a long length of time rather is the absence of time. So don’t let Saturn push you around. Blow him a kiss and tell him you love him.)
A few moments later, after having read the writs, Jupiter looks up obviously not pleased. That’s okay with me, lawyers are not people pleasures, you know. So, Jupiter says, you expect me to execute these writs giving your clients special dispensation in the matters of their respective partners as per this soulmate and twin flame relationship, is that right?
It is, Your Honor, I say, mouthing at the Bailiff, Saturn, when The Judge glances back down at the writs, “I LOVE YOU”.
And, The Judge continues, you expect this if exercised to grant them karmic immunity thereafter in any proceedings with said respective individual they engage with into perpetuity, is that your argument here?
I not only expect it, Your Honor, but with all due respect, I rather demand it. The legal precedent here is impeachable as I have pointed out, my clients contracts were written within the greater reality of which this reality is a subset so therefore any such contractual agreement made by eternal souls within said greater reality supersedes any law of this physical galaxy over which your court and your most High Honor presides.
Jupiter is silent so I press on through what I sense is an advantageous moment of consideration on His part – Your Honor, clearly, in fact, You and Your Court have no real authority in this matter. I am merely here out of my abiding and sincere respect for Your Laws and to bring absolute clarity in respect to my clients future action in this to what I well understand is a matter of the highest import involving the relative negation of both free will and consequence of action. I would like very much to have Your Writ of Dispensation in this matter going forward, Your Honor.
And so, in the end, Jupiter did sign the writs giving full karmic immunity to my clients actions. In both cases, each had earned this by being trustworthy to act out of unconditional love for their soulmate and twin flame and this was merely a formality but one I trusted would prevent any future repercussions in the matter – Virgo Ascendant so always like to look ahead, you know. I did advise both clients that while in this particular matter they do enjoy full karmic immunity, assuming they live a while longer, they will no doubt appear again before Jupiter in another matter in which they are not under the protective auspicious of such a writ of dispensation and Judges have very long memories – none more so than Jupiter, mind you – so best not to antagonize Jupiter through any show of hubris or most especially any betrayal of acting out of unconditional love in this matter, technically legal as it may be at this point.
All in a days work.

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